August 28, 2004
20 anecdotes, part three
11. During the same year (Grade 4), I was asked by my utterly horrible Homeroom teacher to strip in front of the class. No, not out of utter sadism, but one of my classmates caught my friend and I engaging in *very shocking* sexual conversations. She told our Homeroom teacher about it, and in her *shock*, she asked me to strip in front of the class. I don't know if it was in jest (I doubt) but what am I to do? I'm a growing kid. I need to know these things.
12. One of the worst things I did as a kid I did during the sixth grade. For our Home Economics class, we were asked to create a lantern. I did not pass any lantern, but inadvertently passed a project as my own. Inadvertently. Hindi sinasadya. When asked by my teacher if I passed the project, I rose up and positively sputtered: "Pinass ko na po." She then asked for witnesses who saw me pass the lantern, and many raised their hands. I was dumbfounded. It turned out that the lantern I carried for my friend was the lantern they saw. What a narrow escape!
13. Same year. I used the money my parents gave me for my Ateneo de Davao High School application forms to buy a Hardy Boys book, which was unusually high-priced. I was not able to take the exam. Thank God I passed the Pisay exam or I would have ended up in the ditch.
14. Same year. I didn't go home early in favor of a Sailor Moon Playstation game with my friends. MOON BUNNY POWER! Hah.
15. And then came high school. I was not the opposite of who I was in grade school, but to a certain extent, I was. I was more academic, thinking more of how to raise my grades, and I was nicer and kinder to my parents and to others, and I was less rash and clumsy. However, this does not mean that I had no moments of weakness. I had moments of weakness. Consider for instance the time when we played agawan-base for PE and I tripped over my own feet. I skidded across the cement ground and got my elbows and knees scraped. I had to go to the clinic to have it cleaned and gauzed. That was a fun afternoon!
The last set of anecdotes will come soon. Hahaha. This is way too fun. I don't have to think of creative posts anymore! Kidding. Regular programming will be back after the last set of anecdotes.
August 25, 2004
20 anecdotes, part two
6. Jeffrey, that kid whom I had a fistfight with, won during that fight. I eventually had my revenge. We were playing darts, and when it was my turn to throw the dart, I threw it in his direction. It landed on a sore on his leg. Tee-hee. I think I went up to him and asked if he was all right. Score!
7. When I finally went to school (kindergarten, I think), I was first a very shy and very silent little boy. I remember looking out the windows while my teachers were discussing some ABC's and 123's in class. One feisty teacher, however, noticed me daydreaming, and in her frustration, took an eraser from the ledge of the blackboard and sent in hurling towards my direction. I do not remember whether it missed or not. As these things go, it probably didn't.
8. I graduated valedictorian in kindergarten. As valedictorian, I had to recite a speech which my father made, and to my little brain at that time, that speech was 20 pages long. (I found the speech years later, and found it to be only 3 paragraphs long.) I did not like memorizing it. At all. So one day, while Mama and Papa were teaching me the speech, I gave some excuse to enter the house. What I actually did was escape through the back door. My mother spotted me, and, with a broomstick in her hand, chased me through the boarding house and swatted me with it when she finally caught up with me. Even her friend could not stop her from expressing her wrath. Ouch!
9. My older brother tells me that when I was a baby, he used to lift me by the feet to bump my head on the concrete floor. I don't believe it one bit, but on second thought, it's something he would try... I think.
10. After Zamboanga, we transferred to Davao. I studied elementary at Ateneo de Davao University. During Grade 4, my Work Education teacher asked us to create an embroidery. To those in the know, this means punching a needle with a yarn to and fro a cement sack until you get a fluffy embroidery creation. But I did not do that. Instead of a needle with a yarn, I glued the yarn on the cement sack. I got a D for Doofus.
That's it for now. There's more to come!
August 23, 2004
20 anecdotes, part one
1. When I was 5 or 6, I placed my head under the faucet to bathe myself. I just loved the way the water rushed through my hair. Unfortunately for me, I forgot that that water had a source, and that source was directly above me. I immediately lifted my head up. Guess what happened? The back of my head scraped itself against the faucet, carrying with it a generous chunk of hair and skin. Never ever did merthiolate become that painful.
2. When I was around 7, I loved to run across the green "lawn" in front of the house we lived in. Note "lawn." It had rocks all over the place and it was perhaps run over by weeds of the tripping variety. In short, it was a dangerous lawn. Well, I was victimized by the lawn once. I tripped on a weed, and my foot scraped itself on a rock. I lost my little toenail. My mother boiled guava leaves in water, and I submerged my poor foot in it until the pain eventually went away.
3. It was also near that same house where a black cat decided to have a field day with my hands using its paws. The merthiolate struck again!
4. Near our house in Zamboanga was a boarding house. When I was around the age of 6, I rushed upstairs the boarding house only to see a huge hole gaping on the floor. I was curious and decided to dangle myself from that hole. What a stupid move, right? It was. I was so scared of falling, that I screamed and screamed for help. I forgot what happened next. I probably survived.
5. One of the inhabitants of that evil boarding house was a little kid named Jeffrey. (I was also a little kid, then, and Jeffrey was older.) For some apparent reason, he was the only person I had a fistfight with. Ever. During my entire life. I don't know what triggered that killer instinct in me. Perhaps it was his annoying face.
That's it for now, folks. I'll continue the rest of the anecdotes by tomorrow. Good night and enjoy laughing at my expense! :D
THE AMAZING RACE
This friend gave me the ultimate gift: an Amazing Race of my own.
I cannot anymore spare the very details, as my hands are tied and my head's full of colorful memories. Let it suffice to say that I was led from a boarding house in Makati, to a mini-store in JP Rizal Avenue, to a DETOUR choosing between two ways of transportation, to a leg-numbing race to catch a delayed bus, to a wonderful, wonderful place in Sta. Rosa, Laguna, to a ROADBLOCK involving a wizard with a white beard, to a ship that tilted 90 degrees to the very pinnacle of the sky, to a peaceful relaxing wheel, to a wet and wild river ride, to a wet and wild raging rapids, to a ride that blasts to space, to a dizzying FAST FORWARD dilemma, to a YIELD which was not planned yet appeared to be that sign which indicated that yes, the universe conspired for us, to a moviehouse which featured robotic wives, and finally to a satisfying PITSTOP which had details all of its own.
Let me take time to catch my breath.
Jel, you've been a really great friend to me. Thank you for the effort. Thank you for the thoughtfulness. Thank you for everything. We've been through this one amazing race, may we be together for the other seasons to come.
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